Birthday blues

Omg its my Birthday, there was a time when I would be so happy, but now I don’t know how I feel- happy , sad or plain nothing. I am all confused, does turning 27 do this to everyone.  Suddenly I feel like finding a purpose for myself, questioning on what I am doing. Is my life always going to be like this – wake up at 6.30 (lets be honest today -7) rush to take a shower, get dressed and its salwar kameez or kurtha paijama whatever u call it sometimes I   hate it so much. Everyday morning prayer , eat  and rush to the highway, wait for the car and then a 45 min long drive to the college. Teach subjects u don’t actually like and then back home all tired. Sometimes help mom, most of the time don’t, and after dinner, grab a book read for sometime and go off to sleep. This was not how life was supposed to be, what about all the plans, what about doing something good for a cause, everything has been swept aside. I feel I’ve lost my capacity to think.

With every passing year the questions increase, well meaning relatives asking “when are you getting married?” Why don’t they leave me alone? Can’t I be happy single; the thought of marriage gives me a panic attack.

Between all these thoughts , its still my birthday today, and I’m eagerly waiting to see what gift Mom n Dad have bought for me. Ill be buying a book for myself as a b’day giftJ

Happy Birthday to Me

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